Monster M*A*S*H
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38 Across is the 113th episode of M*A*S*H, and the 16th in the fifth season of the show, which originally aired on CBS-TV on January 11, 1977. It was directed by Burt Metcalfe, and written by Everett Greenbaum and Jim Fritzell.

Synopsis[]

Hawkeye calls his naval doctor friend for help in a crossword puzzle, but his message is too vague and results in an admiral coming to the 4077th to help with a supposed serious medical crisis.

Full episode summary[]

During the latest lull in activity at the 4077th, Hawkeye receives a New York Times crossword puzzle and becomes determined to finish it. Everyone in the camp contributes to the puzzle, and soon there is only one word remaining: five letters meaning "Yiddish; bedbug." No one can decipher this last clue.

Meanwhile, Klinger launches his latest Section 8 scheme - he plans to EAT an entire Jeep to prove how crazy he is. Potter remains unconvinced as he watches Klinger swallow lug nuts and a windshield wiper, but the Corporal persists. Shortly after, Klinger rushes to the doctors in pain - he needs an emergency stomach pump.

In desperation to solve the crossword puzzle, Hawkeye contacts a Navy friend who is a crossword expert named Tippy Brooks serving on an aircraft carrier. The communication lines are damaged during Hawkeye's call, but the doctors soon learn Tippy is coming to the M*A*S*H, along with his supervisor, Admiral Cox. They believe Hawkeye is requesting urgent assistance for a medical issue.

At first, Tippy is glad to see his old friend, but when Hawkeye explains the true nature of his call, Brooks is horrified - if the Admiral learns he came all this way for nothing, both doctors could face court-marial. Hawkeye attempts to pass off some unremarkable Post Op cases as urgent issues for the Admiral (including Klinger's X-ray showing a stomach full of machine parts), but Cox is unconvinced.

Father Mulcahy bursts in to announce there has been a terrible accident with some locals; a supply truck overturned and some kerosene exploded while the Koreans were scavenging leftover fuel. Brooks and Admiral Cox both quickly jump into triage to help the burn victims, and the resulting surgery session lasts several hours.

As they prepare to leave the next day, Cox asked once again why Hawkeye had called them to MASH. Hawkeye is forced to confess the crossword puzzle problem, and Cox is outraged that they had someone come all this way just to learn the word "vantz." Brooks is scared, but Hawkeye is thrilled - the puzzle is finished!

All this time, Frank has been playing with a ball bearing toy. He manages to get all the BBs in his toy in place - until Hawkeye upsets the toy. Frank has a hissy fit...and then starts over again (this scene is usually cut from syndicated airings).

Research notes/Fun facts[]

  • Gwen Farrell, frequently in the background in most episodes, gets a credit here as an anesthetist. She is assisting Frank when he tells Hawkeye that he doesn't need any assistance. She interjects to say they are losing the patient - whereupon Frank yells for help.
  • There is an unidentified Nurse Baker in this episode. B.J. tells her to take an X-ray of Klinger, and later, asks her to bring the X-ray to show Admiral Cox. Towards the end of the episode, she helps at triage. If you want to try to identify her, see Unidentified Nurses.
  • If Klinger really had drank motor oil, he would have gotten quite ill, or possibly died.
  • Actor Dick O'Neil guest starred on M*A*S*H three times, each time playing an officer of one of the three different branches of the US Armed services: once as a US Navy Admiral, one as a US Army General, and once as a USMC Colonel.
  • Oliver Clark, who plays Hawkeye's friend, Tippy Brooks, returns a season later playing "Captain Benjamin Pierce" whose mail is accidentally sent to Hawkeye due to their names being the same ("Mail Call Three"). In that episode, Clark's Pierce, despite not appearing as handsome or charming as Hawkeye, gets a lot of women sending him love letters, and Hawkeye can't understand why.
  • The name "38 Across" is an allusion to the fact that the MASH unit is stationed along the 38th parallel.
  • USS Essex deployments in the Korean War were from August 1951 – March 1952 and July 1952 – January 1953.
  • In real life, POW exchanges in Korea did not happen until summer 1953.
  • The actress who provides the voice of Seoul City Sue is uncredited and unknown.
  • Hawkeye reads that Senator Joseph McCarthy is alleging there are communists in the military. While McCarthy had accused the State Department of harboring "known communists" as early as 1950, his "investigation" of the Army did not begin until late 1953, after the Korean War was over.

Guest stars/Recurring cast[]

Gallery[]

External links[]

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