I Hate a Mystery was the tenth episode of the first season of the TV series M*A*S*H. Written by Hal Dressner and directed by Hy Averback, the episode originally aired on CBS-TV on November 26, 1972 and was shown again on June 10, 1973, during the network's Daytime TV summer sweeps period.
Synopsis[]
A rash of thefts breaks out in the camp. Missing pieces include Frank's silver picture frame, Margaret's hair brushes, a fishing reel Henry was going to give Nurse Leslie, Hawkeye's swizzle stick, and Trapper's watch. The camp is searched, and everything is found in Hawkeye's locker, leaving the other MASH personnel suspicious of, and worse, disappointed in Hawkeye. Radar takes to following him everywhere, watching his every move, and even Trapper stops talking to him.
Hawkeye manages to let it be known to the camp where the recovered items have been stored (they have been locked in Col. Blake's desk). When the items disappear yet again, Hawkeye summons certain members of the MASH personnel to the mess tent in the middle of the night in order to reveal the identity of the criminal. After parodying countless detective stories by revealing possible motives others might have to frame him (jealousy, resentment, etc.), he tells the assembled staff that he has treated the items with a chemical which, when it comes into contact with a human being, turns that person's fingernails blue.
When Ho-Jon hides his hands, Hawkeye knows he has found the criminal. (The chemical treatment story was merely a bluff.) Ho-Jon is not punished, however, as he has stolen the items only to raise money to bribe border guards to bring his family from the north to the south.
In the epilogue, we see Frank and Margaret discussing the Bible with Father Mulcahy in the Mess Tent. Mulcahy says that after Jesus returned from the Garden, he found three of the apostles were missing. All eyes turn to Hawkeye, who say, "Well, don't look at me, I didn't take them!"
Research notes/Fun facts[]
- This episode derives its title from the popular adventure radio serial (1939-44) and subsequent film (1945) I Love A Mystery.
- Ho-Jon attends Hawkeye's late-night meeting even though his name isn't called.
- This is the only time we see Hawkeye smoke.
- Lt. Bannerman and Radar enter the mess tent as their names are being called. (Of course with Radar, this is typical.)
- First appearance of Radar's teddy bear. It was neither seen in the film, nor mentioned in the novel.
- Father Mulcahy's Bible story is inaccurate.
- The picture of Frank Burns' mother is a stage prop; contrary to urban legend, it is not the same picture of the old woman seen in the locket of the dead criminal Dino in the 1959 Tarzan movie Tarzan's Greatest Adventure.
- When Hawkeye is interrogating the MASH staff in the Mess Tent, we see Spearchucker wearing a lavender sweater. Hawkeye would later receive this same sweater in the mail (from his sister, while she was still canon) in Season 2's "Mail Call", and it would make random appearances on Hawkeye throughout the rest of the series.
- Les Misérables is mentioned in a PA announcement as a "tale of a man who steals and is relentlessly pursued - sorta like somebody we all know", pointing to the theory of Hawkeye being the thief.
- It's possible that the Les Misérables reference was anachronistic. There WAS a 1952 version of the film. But it's doubtful that such a "new" movie would have made its way out to a MASH unit in Korea so soon after release - particularly so early in the series. It is also possible that the unit received a reel of the 1935 movie of the same name.
Guest stars/Recurring cast[]
- Timothy Brown as Spearchucker
- Patrick Adiarte as Ho-Jon
- William Christopher as Father Mulcahy
- Bonnie Jones as Lt. Bannerman
- Linda Meiklejohn as Leslie
- Odessa Cleveland as Ginger
- Uncredited appearances:
- Roy Goldman (the soldier who stops to stare at Hawkeye as he yells at Radar hiding in a shrub)