About Nurse Hoffman[edit | edit source]
In "L.I.P.", Hoffman is first seen at the beginning of the episode sitting with Hawkeye during a movie. The movie ends and Hawkeye walks Hoffman to her tent. He says, "We're home." "You're pretty fast with that plural," she replies. She dismisses him and all he gets is a handshake.
Later while talking about the handshake with Trapper, Corporal Phil Walker approaches Hawkeye and asks for his help to get approval for him to marry a Korean woman. He is being shipped home in a few weeks and does not want to leave her and her child behind. Hawkeye agrees to help.
The next night, Hawkeye tries with Hoffman again. This time they are having a candlelight picnic inside an ambulance and it is a great success. Hawkeye discovers that they have many similar interests. She likes the outdoors and she is a three-handicap at golf. "You interest me strangely," he says. Regina also enjoys things that she is not good at - like dancing, and so Hawkeye offers to teach her to dance. The night ends and Regina invites Hawkeye to her tent the following night.
Hawkeye is all ready for the date in Hoffman's tent. He has arranged a picnic basket with coq-au-vin and wine, but Lt. Willis from C.I.D. turns up to investigate and process the application for Walker's marriage to the Korean woman. Willis insists on questioning Hawkeye there and then so Hawkeye sends Klinger with the food to keep Hoffman company. Hawkeye pops in to say he needs a bit more time and will be there about midnight.
When Hawkeye is done with Willis, he turns up at Hoffman's tent but she wants to know what the delay is about. She is displeased that Hawkeye stood her up to arrange for a marriage between Walker and an L.I.P. (local indigenous personnel) and makes clear that she does not approve of such things. Hawkeye is disgusted by her racist attitudes and tells her he wants his handshake back. He tells Hoffman, "You've got a body I'd like to take a lifetime getting to know ... but somewhere in that luscious chemistry are some pretty unappetizing ideas. I don't think I can take the mix." He leaves saying, "Good night ... make that good bye" and then comes back in to take back his wine bottle. Hoffman asks if that is all. Hawkeye says there is one more thing and blows a raspberry at her.