Picture This was the 21st episode of Season 10 of the CBS-TV series M*A*S*H, also the 239th overall series episode. Written by Elias Davis and David Pollock and directed by Hy Averback, it originally aired on April 5, 1982.
Synopsis[]
Colonel Potter is trying to paint a group picture for Mildred, but an argument between the three Swamp dwellers makes things difficult.
Full episode summary[]
Col. Potter's anniversary is coming up, and he's stumped at what to get his wife Mildred. He finally hits on the idea of painting a portrait of his other family - the 4077th - and sending it to her. Unfortunately, he's picked the worst possible time to try and get everyone together, since minor squabbles have broken out among the doctors, quickly blowing up into full-grown fights.
Hawkeye and B.J. are on each other's nerves, so much so that Hawkeye temporarily moves out of the Swamp, taking up residence in a small hut behind Rosie's. This leaves B.J. and Winchester alone together, and while it starts off well, their relationship quickly devolves, too - B.J. is telling numerous stories about his domestic life, especially his daughter Erin and her potty training, which he finds endlessly fascinating, driving Winchester insane. In turn, B.J. is aggravated by Charles' insistence on playing his music while he tries to sleep.
The fighting is so bad that they can't even stay civil while Col. Potter tries to paint them all, and he gets so frustrated, he calls it off. Later, he decides to paint them in groups of two, keeping all the Swamp Rats separate. Father Mulcahy, Klinger, and Margaret each decide to intervene, and individually come up with plans to get the doctors back together: Father Mulcahy works on Winchester, telling him - supposedly confidentially - that Hawkeye wants to come back to the Swamp. Winchester, realizing Hawkeye is a good buffer from B.J.'s endless stories of domesticity, is sympathetic to the idea. Klinger goes to B.J. and tells him that he overheard Winchester recording a letter to his sister Honoria, scheming to drive B.J. out of the Swamp with his music as well, so he can have the place to himself. Margaret tells Hawkeye that B.J.'s daughter has "a urinary problem", trying to inspire some sympathy from Hawkeye.
Eventually Hawkeye moves back into the Swamp, and there's enough of a truce that all six of them reunite for Col. Potter so he can finish the painting. Unfortunately, the web of lies told by Mulcahy, Klinger, and Margaret starts to unravel, and it quickly breaks down into a screaming match among all of them.
Potter finally finishes the painting, shaking his head in disbelief. As the six of them continue to argue, the camera pans back and we see the finished work - a portrait of six good friends, smiling and content.
In the final scene, Charles is listening to his music, and B.J. is dictating yet another letter from home to Hawkeye, who is growing wearier with each syllable. Finally, he's had enough. He moves to sit next to Charles and turns up his record player, much to B.J.'s consternation and Charles' surprise.
Guest stars/Recurring cast[]
- Jeff Maxwell as Igor Straminsky
- John Fujioka as Peasant
Research notes/Fun facts[]
This episode uses the same opening sequence as "Sons and Bowlers".
When Father Mulcahy is discussing Hawkeye with Charles, the music playing is Tchaikovsky's Romeo and Juliet.