Monster M*A*S*H
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Snappier Judgement was the eighth episode of Season 10 of the CBS-TV series M*A*S*H, also the 227th overall series episode. Written by Paul Perlove, and directed by Hy Averback, it originally aired on December 14, 1981.

Synopsis[]

Klinger has his day in court but, no thanks to Charles, it may also be Klinger's last day of freedom, but Hawkeye and B.J. have cooked up a plan of their own to catch the real thief.

Full episode summary[]

After telling Klinger of the severe sentence he would face if found guilty, Potter mentions that the whole thing could be called off if Klinger incriminated the suspected thief ring. Unfortunately, while Klinger would have done that in a heartbeat, he possessed no such knowledge. With that being the case, Klinger wishes he could bring one of his uncles, who is a skilled lawyer, to Korea, but he is presently incarcerated. At that, Potter lets him know that officers are typically used for court martials.

Everyone tries to help Klinger prepare for his court martial. Charles takes up the cause, mostly as a personal challenge, and persuades Klinger to choose him as counsel.

Charles has Margaret and Father Mulcahy prepare written statements defending Klinger's character, but it doesn't go well; Margaret breaks down in hysterics over the very idea of Klinger as an upstanding, model citizen, and Father Mulcahy's story falls apart when it's revealed Klinger had procured stolen bibles for Mulcahy's Sunday services.

Meanwhile, with the real thief still at large, Hawkeye and B.J. come up with their own plan to catch him: they go on and on, loudly, all over camp, about Charles' super-expensive tape recorder, hoping to entice the real thief into trying to steal it, but to Hawkeye and B.J.'s frustration, three days have passed with nobody making an attempt. In the meantime, they have to travel with Charles and Klinger to I-Corps for the court martial.

When they arrive, the Special Court Martial panel consists of five officers and is presided over by a Colonel Drake. Charles immediately assumes the young prosecutor, Captain Rollins, will be a pushover and their case is a shoo-in, but it quickly becomes clear that Rollins excels at his job, and any defense that Charles can offer up is hopelessly inadequate, if not laughable. To make matters even worse for Klinger, Charles proves to be woefully inept, and Rollins manages to extract damning testimony out of both Hawkeye and B.J. The situation gets so hopeless that Klinger asks Rollins if he can represent him for a possible appeal.

Back at the 4077th, just moments after Hawkeye and B.J. return and relay the bad news to Potter, another batch of wounded is announced over the PA system. During the OR session, an MP (one of the same ones who stopped and arrested Klinger with the camera) sneaks into the Swamp and snatches Charles' tape recorder, then carries it behind one of the tents to hide it under a tarp marked 'Danger- Explosives'. Just as the MP pulls back the tarp (underneath which many other stolen items are hidden), a camera shutter is heard clicking; Hawkeye and B.J. were hiding nearby and finally catch the real thief red-handed.

At the court martial, Colonel Drake is about to convict Klinger when Hawkeye and B.J. barge in with the real thief in handcuffs, and their photos of the thief in action. They show the pictures to Drake and reveal that when Captain Rollins pointed out that Klinger wasn't in the OR when the camera was stolen, they realized that all of the thefts took place while they were in surgery, and so they decided to stage a phony OR session using Winchester's tape recorder as bait, which netted the real culprit. Seeing the photos, Drake declares that Hawkeye and B.J. "have helped us avert a serious miscarriage of justice" and dismisses the case against Klinger.

Back at the 4077th, Hawkeye and B.J. give Klinger the camera (since he paid out of his own pocket to get it back), and just as everyone poses for a camp picture, another MP arrives investigating a case involving Mulcahy's stolen Bibles. Klinger ducks away and Mulcahy is flustered, so Charles steps in, offering to be his lawyer, too.

Research notes/Fun facts[]

  • This was the final two-part episode of the series.

Image Gallery[]

Guest stars[]

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